Thick Boy Summer
The Tag-Team Ten
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Thick Boy Summer
Thick Boy Summer
Forecast: 100% chance of thighs. Chunky retro type frames a proudly shirtless hunk serving jorts, joy, and the radical act of taking up space. This is a seasonal declaration, not a request, poolside, park, or poppers aisle. It’s for lads who bring sunscreen and serotonin, who know a crop top is a mindset, and who understand that “dad bod” is just “deluxe.” I wore the sample to the beach and strangers asked me for shade; I complied by standing there. Bruce note: my summer cardio is walking to the esky and back with purpose.
Your reliable flirt
The dependable tee I reach for when I want to look organised while being anything but. Clean shape, soft hand, forgiving on days my personality arrives late. Works for errands, afters, and bumping into your ex with full eye contact. You will not become a better person in it. You will look like one.
Why you’ll live in it
- 100% cotton main body that feels honest on skin.
- Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester.
- Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester.
- Heather colours are 50% cotton, 50% polyester.
- Fabric weight: 170–180 g/m² — sturdy for hugs, breezy for poor decisions.
- Open-end yarn for that classic tee grip that actually holds its shape.
- Tubular fabric with no side seams so it drapes neat over keys, snacks, and secrets.
- Taped neck and shoulders because chafing is for enemies.
- Double-needle stitching at sleeves and bottom hem. Commitment issues, solved.
- Blank garments responsibly sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, and Mexico.
Care
Cold wash inside out. Skip bleach. Tumble low or line dry while you apologise to your liver. Keep the iron off the print unless you collect regret.
Notes
- White reads soft white, not appliance white. You are a human, not a fridge.
- Natural may show tiny dark speckles. That’s the cotton being alive. Be nice.
Made to order
Printed after you order to cut waste and warehouse shame. It takes a touch longer, but keeps the planet and my sustainability spreadsheet blushing. Thanks for choosing the thoughtful option.
Size Guide
| Size | Length | Width | Sleeve Length |
|---|---|---|---|
| S | 71.1 | 45.7 | 39.7 |
| M | 73.7 | 50.8 | 43.2 |
| L | 76.2 | 55.9 | 47 |
| XL | 78.7 | 61 | 50.8 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 66 | 54.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 71.1 | 58 |
| 4XL | 86.4 | 76.2 | 61.5 |
| 5XL | 89 | 81.3 | 64.3 |
FREE SHIPPING
Free shipping across Australia. Because Daddy always takes care of the bill (at least this time).
SUPPORT 24/6
We’re here day and night, except Sundays. Even God took one off.
Returns & Refunds
Faulty? Fixed. Changed your mind? That tee’s your new flatmate.
Secure Checkout
Your payment’s locked down tighter than my jaw at Mardi Gras.
